| 1. | Category: Judge jokes  |
| A lawyer passed on and found himself in Heaven,but not at all happy with his accommodations.He complained to St. Peter,... more
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| 2. | Category: Judge jokes |
| A prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman, to the stand. He approached her and ask... more
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| 3. | Category: Judge jokes |
| A red-faced judge convened court after a long lunch. The first case involved a man charged with drunk driving who claime... more
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| 4. | Category: Judge jokes |
| A red-faced judge convened court after a long lunch. The first case involved a man charged with drunk driving who claime... more
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| 5. | Category: Judge jokes |
| A young woman was appearing in court to face a public disorder charge. The charges were read out, and she was asked how... more
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| 6. | Category: Judge jokes |
| At night court, a man was brought in and set before the judge.The judge said, "State your name, occupation, and the char... more
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| 7. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Before a burglary trial, the judge explained to the defendant, "You can let me try your case, or you can choose to have... more
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| 8. | Category: Judge jokes |
| How is a judge like an English teacher?They both hand out long sentences.... more
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| 9. | Category: Judge jokes |
| How many judges does it take to change a light bulb?Just one; he holds it still and the whole world revolves around him.... more
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| 10. | Category: Judge jokes |
| It seems that a lawyer had a little bit too much to drink and on his way home rear-ended the car in front of him. The la... more
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| 11. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Judge to witness: "And where was the location of the accident?"Witness: "Approximately milepost 499."Judge:: "And where... more
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| 12. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Judge: "Is it true that you owe your neighbor a thousand dollars?"Defendant: "Yes, its true."Judge: "Then, why dont you... more
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| 13. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Judge: All your responses to the questions must be oral. Do you understand?A: YesJudge: What school did you attend in th... more
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| 14. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Judge: Are you married?A. No, Im divorced.Judge. And what did your husband do before you divorced him?A. A lot of things... more
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| 15. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Judge: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?A: All my autopsies are on dead people.... more
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| 16. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Judge: Is there any reason you could not serve as a juror in this case? Juror: I dont want to be away from my job that l... more
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| 17. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Judge: What is your relationship with the plaintiff?A: She is my daughter.Judge: Was she your daughter on February 13, 1... more
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| 18. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Judge: You stated that the stairs went down to the basement, is that correct?A: Yes.Judge: And these same stairs, did th... more
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| 19. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Judge: Your first marriage was terminated by death?A: Yes, by death.Judge: And by whose death was it terminated?... more
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| 20. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Jury: Twelve men and women trying to decide which party has the best lawyer.Justice: A decision in your favor.... more
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| 21. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Mr. Schneider stood up in court. "As God is my judge, I do not owe myex-wife any money."Glaring down at him, the judge r... more
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| 22. | Category: Judge jokes |
| People who love sausage and respect the law should never watch either being made.... more
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| 23. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Prosecutor: Did you kill the victim?Defendant: No, I did not.Prosecutor: Do you know what the penalties are for perjury?... more
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| 24. | Category: Judge jokes |
| Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faced the opposing lawyers. "So," he said, "I have been presented, by both of... more
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| 25. | Category: Judge jokes |
| The cross eyed judge looked at the three defendants in the dock and said to the first one, "So how do you plead?""Not gu... more
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| 26. | Category: Judge jokes |
| The defendant stood up in the dock and said to the judge, "I dont recognize this court!""Why?" asked the Judge."Because... more
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| 27. | Category: Judge jokes |
| The Judge admonished the witness, "Do you understand that you have sworn to tell the truth?""I do.""Do you understand wh... more
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| 28. | Category: Judge jokes |
| The Judge asked the defendant, "Mr. Jones ,do you understand that you have sworn to tell the truth, the whole truth and... more
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| 29. | Category: Judge jokes |
| The judge said to his dentist: "Pull my tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth."... more
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| 30. | Category: Judge jokes |
| What did the judge say when a skunk entered the courtroom?Answer: Odor, Odor in the court!!!... more
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